New faces...warm hearts

Page 33

Blessed Creator:

I pray for good health this day and perhaps a peaceful sleep.

I'm in La Ronge, Sask. now. God's beautiful creations - what colors! I can feel a beautiful fall coming in Saskatchewan.

A lot of thoughts entered my heart while picking sage by Whitecap.

Little do they know that I too struggle. I'm faced with the reality of deterioration - weight loss. I notice some veins are becoming noticeable. For a couple of days I stayed in bed feeling a sense of self-pity. I could choose to go out and drink myself to death or shove a needle in my arm and call it quits. But, I do not thanks to my first and precious partner. Comments like "I won't let you give up" encouraged me. There was no pity offered. I realized just how precious a relationship can be. I also realized how precious life is and how important it is to not give up. I realized that I must place my health before my relationship. Creator, health first. The relationship would follow.

I chose to get out of bed and eat the proper foods and walk to build up my muscle tissues. I love my previous partner for teaching me. And yes, I may not have this person near when I die. Who knows?

Being on the road does take away some of this loneliness. I can imagine how many out there who have this disease struggle with loneliness. I have seen many who are diagnosed filled with anxieties because of their desires, or should I say, craving for a mate. They will got to extremes, which is in itself destructive. Be careful.

Speaking of loneliness. I heard on CBC Radio on Sept. 29 that prostitutes (silent voices) are no longer using condoms. Johns are paying twice the amount for fees. And yes, some of these johns are well-respected husbands, celebrities, movie stars and even corporate executives. . . Influential beings and pillars of the community. What of your wives and children who must bear the shame.

Recently, I was in Edmonton to do an on-the-street interview with some Aboriginal male prostitutes (silent voices) to understand why they hustle? Bottom line - it's called work and survival. Hepatitis B and C is on the rise. Also HIV and AIDS. There is no vision beyond that mighty dollar when it comes to lust, greed and selfishness.

Other than this Creator, at least I always look forward to life itself and I do look forward in meeting new faces and warm hearts. I just wanted to let you know where I was at this day.

Time to carry on with my illness in my moccasin miles for freedom.

Eagle Boy

Ken Ward