Extreme parliamentary hearings- make for good TV

Page 14

Medium Rare

I've just watched some really good television. It's got a strong plot, good characters, a surprising hero, a mysterious villain, lots of dramatic tension and-best of all-it's real. That's right. Reality TV!

Who produces the show? CBC? CTV? APTN? Are you daft? It's CPAC, the Cable Public Affairs Channel. That's right-CPAC. Surprised? Even people who work there say the network's ratings double if 10 people watch. But guess what? The show's good.

It's unedited, gavel-to-gavel coverage of the Standing Committee on Aboriginal Affairs, Northern Development and Natural Resources. This committee is looking at Bill C-7, the First Nations governance act. Boring? Hardly.

It's got everything. A life and death struggle and high political intrigue. The clock is ticking. Is the fortune of a future prime minister of Canada at stake? Holy-moley, the rights of a whole race of people are on the line! Will our hero succeed? And just who the hell is this guy anyway?

What's at stake? Just the whole ball of wax when it comes to things like Aboriginal "self-government" and "sovereignty." That, by the way, is a clue to the identity of our hero.

First, though, let me give you a taste of things. The date is April 30. The committee has just weathered marathon sessions where one committee member, NDP MP Pat Martin (Winnipeg Centre), filibustered the agenda. What's a filibuster? Jamming the works. Taking the floor. Refusing to shut up. Eating up time.

The tactic worked for a while, until the Liberals, who dominate the committee, of course, put a limit of 10 minutes on each speaker. Still, there are dozens of amendments. The night before, the committee met until 4:30 a.m. until there were only eight members left in the room-no quorum, no business.

"If this has turned into some kind of a game of chicken as to who can take it and who's tough enough to sit here the longest," said Pat Martin, "then why don't we just say so right here and now? Maybe we should resolve it by arm-wrestling each other or something instead of pretending this is a dialogue about a debate, because it makes a mockery of the serious issues we're debating here, when what it's really all about is who can sit here the longest without dropping from exhaustion."

Kewl! Forget Survivor in the Amazon. Survivor hits Parliament Hill. Extreme debates. Let's step outside, baby! A whole bunch of middle-aged white dudes using every dirty trick in the book, dissing each other over the Indian Act until the other side drops from exhaustion. I think we got a winner here, APTN. Screw that bingo crap.

Fuh- ged-ah-bow-dit.

Mr. Julian Reed (Halton, Lib.): "Just to correct the record [about a quorum], is it not the case that the nine members must include one opposition member? "

The Chair: "No, Mr. Reed, it has to be nine members, any members. It could be nine Liberals to operate."

Mr. Julian Reed: "So if nine Liberals were here, then the opposition would not need to be present? "

The Chair: "That's right."

Like I said, great TV. I haven't seen such raw arrogance, such disdain for democratic principle, such ham-handed use of power, since J.R. and Dallas bit the dust. The chair of the committee is Ray Bonin (Nickel Belt, Lib.). Why does Jabba the Hutt come to mind?

The villain? None other than the 10-Million-Dollar Man himself, Bob Nault, the minister of Indian Affairs. He forked out $10 million on expensive cross-country "consultations" (mostly empty chairs), a web site, a lot of the spending unaccountable. It's Nault's bill. He says it'll make band councils more accountable. Nice twist.

What did he get? Ten thousand people told him not to cut out the chiefs. Aye carumba! What does Cowboy Bob do? He cuts out the chiefs. Yo, Canadian Taxpayers Federation! These are our tax dollars at work.

And who is the hero of this show? Who is the ultimate survivor? Think "sovereignty?" Think Quebec. Think Bloc Quebecois? That's right. C'mon down, Yvan Loubier

(Saint-Hyacinthe-Bgot). In his quiet way (at least in translation), Loubier keeps making points.

Take financial accountability:

"Several statistics have been provided by the Auditor General, who told us that the problems with financial management did not lie with the First Nations, but with the Department of Indian Affairs. And that is the major problem."

Or claims by the Department of Indian Affairs that bands must prove they can manage their own affairs by meeting requirements even DIAND cannot satisfy:

"You are giving them (bands) only 45 days to prepare a recovery plan, whereas the Department of Indian Affairs has been asked for several years to get one together and it still has not been done."

And then there are Loubier's warnings that parts of the FNGA may be illegal or unconstitutional:

"The Canadian Bar Association, the Quebec Bar and the Indigenous Bar Association have all come to the same conclusion: the provisions in this bill often override the rights and provisions found in the Canadian Constitution and even in certain federal statutes."

So why pick Loubier for the hero and not some other MP? Because Loubier gets it. He REALLY gets it. He's not just mouthing words fed to him by some Assembly of First Nations flunky. He knows sovereignty issues. He sees the hypocrisy and lies, the stupidity and waste in federal Indian policy. And he challenges it in no uncertain terms.