The gray area of the urban Indian

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Urban Indian. That's what I am, through and through, and proud of it. I remember growing up and feeling just a little confused about what that meant exactly. We all know what our traditional ancestors were like, or at least have a good idea. We can try to emulate them in our day-to-day life. Those who live on the reserve, raised amongst other Aboriginal children, have even stronger ties to their people and traditions. What I'd like to bring to attention is the gray area of the Urban Indian.

I remember the first time I ever heard the term "apple," before growing up and wondering "Would I be considered an apple?"I had understood about my culture and traditions. I was also aware of our history, policies regarding our people and even traditional ceremonies, but even then I knew I hadn't lived it. All I knew was that I was an Indian, and I was taught to be proud of it.

It must be brought to light what it was like growing up with non-Indian kids, and only one or two other Indian kids. I even remember trying to go to powwows and meet other kids my age and make some new friends. But the fact was plain and simple: I was different. I didn't dance at the powwow, and I didn't really know my relatives all that well. I was just some dumb kid passing through.

One of my most vivid memories has my own mother getting angry that I was rejecting who I was. The fact was that I knew all too well who I was. I knew who my people were and I didn't reject them. The most ironic thing was that I was the one who was rejected! Not a conscious effort, I'm sure, but as my differences presented themselves, I simply didn't fit in all that well.

Today, I could care less. I know who I am and what I can do. I am more than aware of my culture, traditions and people. I've put my best effort forward and learnt what I could. I am Indian and proudly state it. I wouldn't be where I am today without the support of my people.

Now don't get me wrong. This isn't an exercise in self-affirmation. I merely want it known about this area of gray; the urban Indian youth. I want the reader to have the slightest glimpse into a world that is rarely brought to attention. The world of contemporary urban Indian youth. Rarely do we pay attention to this group of individuals, and I believe it calls for further scrutiny.

The other day, I heard a youth worker in one of the centres state how people are patterning themselves after another race group and how it was fascinating because it was unprecedented. He meant of course how our youth are taking on certain aspects of the young African-American population.

I also read a few months ago that in the cities our people have the highest crime rate and that domestic violence is frighteningly high. I think this is where the next area of concentration and development needs to take place. I think this is where our leaders need to pay more attention, and that more special programs need to take place.

On a positive note, I am very pleased with the effort that has been put forth to date. We have made significant strides in the area of helping each other and our people as a whole. Last summer, I enjoyed participating in these summer spots for kids set up and run by our people. In Saskatoon, to see that they were also teaching some Indian arts and crafts was indeed a joy. I think these day to day programs need to be applauded.

On the whole, I believe we've come a long way from even just a few years ago. We make steady, constant progress and with the herald of a new millennium, I can only retain optimism that there will be an emphasis placed on the matter of Urban Indians.