Trip to Italy should provide measure of peace

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First Nations soldiers fought during both World Wars, the Vietnam War and the Korean conflict, and in some cases died in battle. The families of some of those men never got the remains of their loved ones back to bury on their own territory, and in many cases, they never knew where the remains ended up.

One Akisqnuk band family is finally going to see first hand the grave that contains a father and a brother who made the ultimate sacrifice during the Second World War. They hope it will provide some closure.

"I have always had these vague memories of someone, a man, but I have never been sure who he is," said Joan O'Neil of the spectre she believes is her father. Toby Nicholas left his family on the Columbia Lake Reserve to fight when Joan was just three years old. Two years later he was killed in action, but until recently, his family never knew what happened to him after his death.

On May 9, Joan, Toby's sister Felicity (Phyllis) Nicholas, his nieces Lola and Martina Nicholas, and granddaughter, Beverley O'Neil, will travel to Italy to visit the site of Toby's grave in Agira, Sicily.

Joan's longtime friend, Rochelle (Rocky) Krebs, will accompany the group to provide support, as will resident care aide Danny Burgoyne.

The gravesite was located by chance by a woman who was visiting the Sicily site nearly 10 years ago.

"She was there and saw these crosses with names on them and where the men had come from," explained Phyllis. "So she took pictures and sent them to Cranbrook in case anyone knew them and wanted to see their graves. They ended up being sent to me, and one was my father's grave."

Phyllis said she has often spoken about a longing to know where her brother ended up, and that it was her dream to go to his gravesite one day.

"I have talked to Patsy (Nicholas, Community Health Representative for Akinqnuk Band) about it many times."

A year ago, Patsy began a campaign to send Phyllis and other family members to Italy, and in the fall of 2004 they were informed of the plans for them to go. Fundraising and donations have paid for the family and Burgoyne to go, with Krebs and Joan's daughter Beverly paying their own way.

"Rocky has been my friend for over 40 years," said Joan, "and when I told her about the trip, right away she said 'I'm coming with you. I'll pay my own way.' It really took me by surprise."

Joan added that Beverly has been doing "lots and lots of research" prior to the trip regarding First Nations people in the wars.

None of the women are sure just what to expect when they get to Toby's grave.

"I have something my daughter made to leave at his gravesite, but we may not be allowed to,"

said Joan. "I don't think any of us are sure how we will feel, but there will be some closure I think.

"I have often wondered what my life would have been if he had been here. Would I have had a

bunch of brothers and sisters? He would have been able to meet his grandchildren ... all these thoughts come into my head every so often."

Phyllis too is unsure of what to expect.

"I was about 10 years old when he left," she said. "I remember him being a hunter. In the winter he would go after cougars, in the summer minks. Those minks are wise though, and it would take him a couple of weeks sometimes to get just one. In summer he would hunt deer."

Toby's horse, a blue roan, is a strong memory in the mind of Martina and Phyllis. Lola was not yet born when Toby left. Joan recalls her father's horse as well, more because she rode it so often herself when she was young.

"He would ride to Golden and back on that horse," recalls Phyllis. When asked how long it would take to make the round trip, she laughs. "It took however long it was until he got back."

The group will fly out of Calgary May 9 to Frankfurt, Germany, travel to Rome and then Catania, Italy. They return to Canada on May 23.

"Patsy has been arranging for us to have a tour guide," said Joan. "We'll havea bit of time to ourselves as well though."

Beverley will be flying out on May 6, arriving ahead of the group to make sure everything is in place.

"I will be 65 soon," muses Joan. "My dad would have been in his 90s now. I don't think Native soldiers were treated very well, and it seems people don't really like to acknowledge what they did even still today."

For the Nicholas family, the trip to Italy will provide answers to at least some of the questions they have been asking for decades, and with those answers will come some measure of peace.