Men learn to take responsibility for abusive behavior

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According to Statistics Canada, one in every eight women will experience abuse, and that number is on the increase.

Domestic abuse affects all cultures, including the Aboriginal community.

A program called Change of Seasons, supported by the Attorney General Corrections Branch, First Nations Wellness Society, Ministry of Health (Aboriginal Health Policy Branch) and the Squamish Nation, is available to men in North Vancouver who want to end their own abusive behaviors.

The program is based on a 28-day model where participants gather twice weekly to discuss abuse issues. Each session runs for two-and-a-half to three hours.

During the session, facilitators use cultural teachings and ceremonies and non-Native abuse programs such as the Assaultive Husband Program to help educate particpants about why they are abusive and how they can stop the behavior. Topics covered in the program include myths about abuse, the causes of violence, excuses that enable violence to exist, and discussions of the various ways people are abused.

Abuse can be in the form of threats, isolation, monitoring or restricting another's freedom, anger and intimidation, physical, psychological and sexual. The reasons why men abuse include stress, learned behavior, social and cultural factors, and feelings of inadequacy, which are all discussed in the program.

The counselors are educated in abuse issues, and many have come from abusive backgrounds themselves. Many have participated in the Change of Seasons facilitator's program that runs 20 to 26 weeks in length. They have come to believe that violence against woman in any society is not acceptable.

The name Change of Seasons comes from the words of one West Coast Elder who said there are two important seasons in a man's life, the fall season, when trees shed their leaves and get rid of the old self, and spring, when mother earth heals herself and begins new life.

Ross Muehlfarth and Robert Nahanee were graduates of the program and are now counselors at the North Vancouver office.

"We've had men from all across Canada take this program," said Muehlfarth. They find that group work is more effective.

"Individual counseling tends to isolate and maintain secrecy," said Nahanee.

Muehlfarth found that there was a major gap in abuse programming for men who wanted to deal with their behavior. So with the vision of Robert Kiyoshk and members of the Squamish Band, this unique program began.

Change of Seasons believes that work with men who abuse their families should be done in their communities and facilitated by other men there. Community outreach workshops that run three to five days are available, as well as community-based facilitator training. The facilitator training enables the graduates to conduct workshops and training in other communities or for their reserve members. Communities interested in Change of Seasons can view how it works on a video produced by the program.

Ending domestic violence has long been considered the responsibility of women's organizations, alcohol and drug treatment programs and the criminal justice system, however, with programs such as Change of Seasons, men are becoming aware that they should be responsible for changing their own abusive behaviors. The Change of Seasons Program allows men the opportunity to help each other through the process.